Sometimes we feel terrible for putting someone through something, and that's ok. It can be really difficult to make choices that are best for you, especially when they affect another person.

Seeing another person suffer in general really sucks. It sucks even more if it’s because of the choices you made for you. Even if it was to make your life better. It can make you feel terrible.

In the end though, you still need to take care of you. You are the best judge of yourself and deciding when it’s time to get out or not. If you made the choice to get out, trust that. Trust it even if they are hurting badly.

Doing what you need for yourself is so important for your personal growth and learning.

Other people will always have their own experiences and deal with things in different ways, and that's ok. Not only that, but the same person could react differently to a repeated situation. Everyone has their own journey and handles things differently.

If you’ve made the decision to get out and they are hurting badly, keep in mind that you are probably hurting too. Just like you, they are feeling their feelings and mourning the way they need to mourn. No one can feel your feelings for you either.

Everyone experiences pain and disappointment sometimes - everyone. Even if you were the one to “cause” the pain and disappointment.

It's ok to make that choice for yourself, because you did what you felt was right for yourself in the moment. Everyone is just trying to do their best, including you and including them. They are processing how they need to and how they are used to, you are moving on the way you need to also.

There are the choices we make and the choices we don’t make. You chose to get out because you needed to, so trust that. If you had a strong enough pull to get yourself out, then that was the Universe guiding you to a different path. How powerful! You trusted your intuition enough to get out even if it hurt the other person.

Take it easy on yourself, you're doing what you feel is best and that is ok.

I went through something similar when I left my long term partner. He was very dependent on me and I had allowed it for a long time, I didn’t know how he would take care of himself after I left. That was a big reason I kept staying. Along with a number of other reasons including having just moved, he had bought a new house based on our dreams of home-making, and we had just adopted an amazing dog.

And I needed to get out. I had that strong pull, that lightning flash of “I need to get out, now” and I trusted it. I could see how badly leaving hurt him. I knew that if I had stayed, though, I would be halting the things I wanted to create in my life. I trusted myself, even when I saw him hurting so badly and I was mourning too.

So I left.

I spent a lot of time feeling terrible for hurting him and putting him through that. And I allowed myself time to grieve that relationship and grieve the pain he was going through. That’s right, I even allowed myself to grieve the pain that he was experiencing. I felt terrible about it! So I allowed the space to mourn for him too.

By doing what I knew was best for me, i.e. getting out, I opened up the space for the things that I really wanted to start showing up.

I learned how to release the responsibility of another person. This was huge for me! The only way it really worked was to remind myself that his journey and his feelings were his to feel. I could not feel or heal them for him.

When you’re driving down a road, you don’t veer into someone else’s lane to help them drive better, do you? No. You stay in your own lane so they can stay in their own lane too.

His feelings, his hurt, his journey was all in his lane, not in mine.

I reminded myself that my feelings and healings were my responsibility, my lane. I’d say, “I know he’s hurting and that’s ok. And I need to stay in my own lane” and “His feelings and journey are not my responsibility, they’re not in my lane.”

Releasing the responsibility of his experience was huge for me. It opened up more space for me to finish feeling my feelings, so I could see the possibilities this space had allowed.

Moving on from something like that can feel awful and so uncomfortable. Take a minute to breathe in and out. You took care of yourself and it is ALWAYS ok to take care of yourself.

You got you, and you’re doing great.

If you want to hear my journey through my long term relationship and transitioning out of it, head to

https://www.manifestingsuccessstories.com/search/?q=vicki

and start listening at Episode #167.

You’re awesome, you’re doing great.