You’ve been trying to manifest a relationship, and it’s not working. How can you manifest a relationship? You’ll hear a lot of different techniques online about the fastest ways to manifest that person. In the past, I had tried lots of different things, visualizing, altars, hypnosis, but nothing. I was still single and desperate for my partner.

Things finally shifted when I started to follow my “feel-goods”. The way you do that is simple, you ask yourself “Does this feel good?”

That is how I manifested my soulmate.

When I thought I was ready to start dating, I asked myself, “Does it feel good to start dating?” The answer was yes.

“Does it feel good to download a dating app?” The answer was yes.

“Does it feel good to continue a conversation with this person?” Sometimes it was a no, and sometimes it was a yes.

I used the “feel good” question to filter out what people I was talking to. It can be a great exercise for you to practice feeling into what feels good and what doesn’t feel good to you. If you’re just starting your manifesting or dating journey, this is a great way to hone your ability to know what feels good and what doesn’t to you.

“Does it feel good to continue a conversation with a person who’s hinting at not wanting kids?” That was a No for me.

“Does it feel good to talk with this person about Halloween movies and zombies?” That was a yes.

Every conversation, every swipe, every heart - all went through the filter of “Does this feel good?” When there wasn’t a clear yes or no, I would just set it down and pick it up again when it felt good, or let it be when it didn’t.

This meant I wasn’t forcing anything that would’ve been a yes to other people’s definitions. I never allowed any stories of “You can’t really know a person until date 4 or 5.” If it didn’t feel good on the first date, I was out. If it didn’t feel good on the second date, I was out. If it didn’t feel good on the 5th date, I was out. I never forced anyone else’s timelines or definitions or experiences on to my own experience. “Don’t talk about marriage or kids on the first date.” That didn’t feel good to me, so I allowed the topic to come up if it came up naturally.

There were people I went on dates with that felt good to say yes to the date, then didn’t feel good after. Sometimes I would simply see the person at the restaurant and I’d automatically know it didn’t feel good. Other times we’d go to set up a second date and it didn’t feel good, so I’d say no.

If it doesn’t feel good to be on dating apps, trust that! It might be because your person isn’t on those apps. If it feels good to be on one dating app and not another, trust that! If it feels good to join a new cross fit gym, trust that!

Saying no when something doesn't feel good can be scary. Especially if you still have other people’s stories and timelines in your head. If you grew up with the understanding that you need to be dating a person for a minimum of 2 years before you can really know you want to marry them - you might feel the urge to push getting into a relationship. That way you can hurry up and get those 2 years under your belt.

By trusting yourself when something doesn’t feel good, you’ll be more efficient in manifesting a relationship. 

It helped me to have pre-planned things I could say to someone I didn’t want to continue seeing. I was always honest and firm in my boundaries. It was something like, “I had a nice time, but I’m not interested in pursuing this.” There were a couple variations of that phrase, but it was always clear and firm. Once I had that figured out and clear, it was much easier for me to let the person know I wasn’t interested in pursuing anything further.

I dated one person who seemed like an absolute yes on paper, but I just couldn’t get past how it never felt good to continue on with them. I always had a yucky feeling every time we talked and every time we hung out. But I continued to push the relationship because I had someone else’s story in my head about a partner and money and timelines. I finally asked myself, “Does it feel good to continue seeing him?” And the answer was a very clear “No.”

I trusted it, and ended things after a month and a half of being together.

Thank goodness, because when I ended things, that person’s true colors came out.

Another man I met online was an absolute hell yes. He checked all of the boxes one would think would make an excellent amazing partner. The day for our date came and I felt like I didn’t want to go on the date. It didn’t feel good to go on the date. Well I forced it anyway. I met him for dinner, and would you guess it? It was an absolute no for me after about 2 minutes. Nothing terrible happened, but it was highly obvious that it was a no for me right away. I trusted that, and we both went our separate ways. I didn’t try to force myself to work through it with him, or fix him or fix me to make it fit better. I simply trusted that my answer was “No” and I moved on.

I had gotten to a point in my dating experience that I wanted to take a break. There’d been so many days where I asked myself “Does it feel good to get on the app right now?” and it kept feeling like a no. I had already scheduled two dates, but I stopped actively getting on the dating apps because it didn’t feel good. It felt good to honor the dates I had scheduled, but I was no longer going on the apps, starting new conversations, or pursuing previous conversations.

One of those dates was the man I married.

Our first date was nice, but I still asked myself “Does it feel good to go on a second date?” and it felt like a yes. So he and I continued dating, following our own feel-goods.

Now, we’ve both realized we’re soul mates, we’re married, and planning our honeymoon cruise. We’re so unbelievably happy.

You can manifest a relationship too. You have to get good at following your feel goods.

Don’t allow anyone’s ideas or stories to come into your head. Those stories of “You can’t find a meaningful relationship online.” Or “The only way to date is online” Or “Dating these days is really hard.” are not helpful.

Following what feels good to you is what will manifest your relationship.

If it doesn’t feel good to scroll on apps, don’t. Trust that it doesn’t feel good and move on.

If it feels good to join a new book club, do it. Trust that it feels good and move on.

If it doesn’t feel good to go on that second date, don’t. Trust that it doesn’t feel good and move on.

If it feels good to reach out to an old friend about a date, do it. Trust that it feels good and move on.

This is how you will manifest a relationship.

It can feel scary to trust that it can be this easy, and I had to learn a lot of things along the way in order to trust that. For me I had a coach, a proven successful program, and built in cheerleaders to support me along the way to learning and trusting that fully.

If you want to get direct support while you’re dating and manifesting your soulmate, the place to start is Manifest $10K. It starts out as a course focused on manifesting money, but you’ll have a coach you can ask any questions you want! About relationships, dating, life, anything!